The thing that makes this job different to any other, aside from the fact that I enjoy it every day, is that I have massively increased my circle of friends.
Not from people who’ve come to play the room.
No, last bus home drunks.
So, you know, yaay.
Tonight, because I answered a question about whether the bus was due or not, a very drunk stick of a man offered to use his bus pass to let me have free travel.
I don’t even know how that works. Unless it was one of those magic “I work/used to work or once knew someone who did work on the buses” pass I can’t see how I could have pulled off looking, in any way, like a tall, skinny, limping drunk man.
I mean yes, it is dark. But a lack of light can only go so far.
Luckily, though, in my experience these people only become my friends while drunk. The guy who got drunk, fell over a wall, slept in someone’s garden and punched a paramedic who came to check he was ok doesn’t recognise me when I pass him in the street, despite us having a conversation – monologue, really – during which I discovered all that information. And I see him a lot. A ridiculous amount of times really. He’s everywhere. And always drunk.
So I probably won’t be remembered by the drunken stick. I’ll have to keep paying my own bus fares.
But I’m back on the late bus next week, so who knows what will happen then?