Eye Rest My Case

Sleep, last night, was not forthcoming. For a long time.

It was almost four o’clock, I think, when I finally managed to drift off into the land of nod. Not that I hadn’t been trying for at least three hours previously, because I definitely had. But it just wasn’t happening. I shall chalk it up to the heat, or something, but then that doesn’t track with later on… but hey, let’s blame it. It’s getting too much positive attention at the moment.

There’s a lot you start to think about, as you wish you were asleep when the first glimmers of daylight start to change the sky. You start to wonder if it’s even worth going to sleep in the first place. Should you just make an extra early start on the day, and get going? I mean, what better time than now, huh? Wide awake, daylight’s on its way. Crack on. Get shit done.

I don’t know what, mind. As nearly everything you could do makes a noise which, at such a time in the morning is louder than any other noise on earth. You have to be considerate to your neighbours (even if half of them are a bunch of arses) because you’re the better person. You can’t bang the radio on and start the washer. It’s just not the done thing. Hoovering’s out of the equation. Probably not the best time to start moving the bins around ready for collection.

It just seems a shame to waste what is clearly a period of highly concentrated alertness.

But wasted it is.

You do, however, learn that the solar lights in the garden are still on at 3 in the morning, which is useful in case a post-midnight dash to the compost heap is necessary.

So ruling out getting stuff done, I made attempt number whatever at sleep. And it worked. I woke up a few hours later and was right as rain. Fresh as a daisy. Bright as a bobbin.

Clearly I didn’t need that much sleep. Obviously I’m just channelling energy like some sort of superhuman. Very little sleep, perky, alert, ready to tackle the day.

Spin forward a few hours.

Sleep grabbed me like a thing under the water in a movie where a thing under the water grabs people.


And I was gone. Snoring away, I imagine, to my heart’s content. And, I believe, there is nothing better than sleeping – mid-afternoon – with all the windows open, knowing that you snore so loudly that it could wake the dead. Enjoy that, all you people outside enjoying your gardens and whatever.

Maybe they thought it was someone cutting wood or something. Who knows.

Clearly I need to trick my body into letting me sleep when I just can’t do it. Instead of actively trying to fall asleep, and all the nonsense that goes with it, I should just tell myself I’m just going to lie here for a minute and then get on. None of this “oh god, it’s 2am I’m going to be getting up in a few hours…” worry and stress. Just “ah, I’ll get on with that in a second. I’m just going to lie here a mo…” and boom.

No tablets or unguents.

Just “resting your eyes” for a moment.