Loss Of App-etite

I’m pretty tech savvy. I know what’s what.

But I’m also pretty tech lazy. I know. The worst kind of tech savvy person. I could be kicked out of nerd club for this alone.

I let my App store updates build up until the number in the little red circle gets to a level which even I find unsettling, and then I deal with it.

This afternoon, not more than six hours ago, I updated thirty of my apps. I don’t even think I have many more than that. So I pretty much updated everything on my phone. And now, it wants me to update eight more apps. It’s only been a few hours!

That’s not to mention the OS update that’s bugging me at the moment. I love the OS updates because they’re so in your face when they arrive. There’s notifications and pop up boxes and you have to acknowledge its existence in some way. You can either deal with it, deal with it in a bit, or ignore it until you’re in the middle of something else when it will rear its head again and offer you the same three choices.

Tech people will tell you it’s a terrible no-no to ignore an OS update. If you don’t update you leave your phone susceptible to crafty hackers and the like. But, and this is the big question, do I need to put my phone out of commission for a period of time just so that an update can be fed to it which will help me find my AirPods.

No.

Because if I ever get AirPods I’m going to have a long talk with myself about what a fricking idiot I look like.

I particularly like the update mechanic for the OS when you tell it to do it later and it’ll ask for your passcode and then tell you it’ll do the update during 1am and 4am. And then it turns back to you, points a finger and says “as long as you plug me in”.

And then you don’t plug it in.

And at 1am your phone gets ready to update and it’s like “ah shit, the lying little…”

And you wake up in the morning to an angry message from your OS saying it couldn’t update because you failed to follow the instructions properly. It will try again. And if you even dare to consider not plugging it in this time there will be consequences.

I think my phone has shouted at me every morning this week.

The thing is, ever since that U2 album, I don’t really trust updates anymore. Who knows what else they’re shovelling in there next to the code for better AirPod locating? I don’t want to find a Trojan Bono anywhere. Not again.

That’s another reason not to get AirPods.

I might accidentally play that album. And you can’t rip them out of your ears as quickly as you can with wired headphones.

The mental scarring would be too much.

There’s another couple of updates to my apps now.

I think I’ve updated some of these twice today already…