I’m beginning to think that my filling is in some way cursed. Or, rather, that my cavity is in some way cursed, so I will never even get as far as a filling.
On the same day that the dentist recoiled in horror at what I thought was a missing filling and later discovered to be an entirely buggered tooth, I had an x-ray. That revealed that I needed a filling. They didn’t know this while I was there because I was allowed to leave before the x-ray was developed.
The dentist phoned me the day after my appointment, but I didn’t answer the call because I was nowhere near my phone. They left no messages regarding the fact I needed to make an appointment for a filling, so I thought it was some sort of customer satisfaction bollocks, which is the sort of thing they’d do, and thought nothing of it.
Two weeks later (!) they called and told me I needed a filling – I can’t just make appointments out of the blue, so I said I’d need to check when was best and ring back. In between this call and me ringing back, I also got a letter telling me that if I didn’t make the appointment I would have to pay for my extraction – a letter essentially accusing me of inaction when they hadn’t called for two whole weeks… but hey.
So I made the appointment.
And they cancelled it because it was the only one on the day for my dentist, so basically she wanted the day off.
So I re-made the appointment.
And I was halfway there this morning when they rang me and cancelled it because the dentist is off sick.
If I cancel an appointment at short notice, I get charged for it… just saying.
So now I have to make it again – obviously they tried to get me to make it today, but if there’s one thing I don’t enjoy doing it’s discussing dental appointments on a packed bus so I said I’d have to call back. Plus the one they offered me was at 3pm and only mad people have appointments in the middle of an afternoon – that right there is a whole day ruined.
So now I’m probably going to get a letter tomorrow accusing me of dental neglect or something because I still haven’t made the appointment yet.
I’m tempted to get hold of Bob Mortimer on Twitter and ask him if I can go round to his and do my own filling, perched on a chair on his kitchen table, or however he said he did it on Would I Lie To You?
That way it might get done…