Access Granted

I got an email the other day, out of the blue, from RBS asking me if I still needed access to their Redeployment website following my redundancy two years ago.

Bloody hell, two years ago.

But the main thing to take away from this is the word “still”.

I never even used the website once – even when I was there. I did have dealings with them because we were sent on courses left, right and centre about how to cope with change and how not to run around like the sky was falling on us but other than that I didn’t partake of anything that could be offered.

What amazed me about this email – and I say amazed in the way someone who isn’t surprised would say they were amazed – is the way it’s going about removing or retaining access to this service.

If I want to have access to the service that I have never used revoked, I have to do more work than I if I want to have access to the service I have never used. I have to go out of my way to contact them and say, “Hey, I don’t need access to the service I have never used” in order to be removed from it. If I do nothing, then I will remain able to fully access the service I have never used.

Surely this is all arse backwards?

Shouldn’t you need to get in touch if you want to keep the access? Isn’t that a better way to do it? That’s how most things I have come across in my entire life have worked.

But more importantly, how can this system which – according to the email – has identified me as someone with access to the service, not identify the fact that in the past two-plus years I have done no more than register for it (because we had to) and agree to go to Manchester for a laminated booklet which was just full of really obvious stuff, but in a large font so you knew it was important.

Surely it must be able to tell I haven’t used it for a while. We used to use a computer system that would wipe you from the face of the planet if you had more than a month off work, and yet two years after leaving this computer’s calling out for me like the teacher in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.

I fully intend to not reply to the email, so I’m going to have access – still – to this system I have never used. I shall file it with the emails I have also never used but have, for the past two years, kept flagged in my inbox, just in case.

Just in case of what, though, I don’t know. I think one of them – I don’t even know what’s in them – might actually be the log in details for the site I’m being asked if I want to continue using.