Jan 16, 2019: Spoil

The world is going to hell in a handbasket.

And no, I’m not talking about Brexit, or lack thereof,  or the fact that Donald Trump can’t spell “hamburger” properly.

I’m talking about the trailer for the new Spider-Man movie which dropped yesterday.

The trailer, which is a couple of minutes long and shows Peter Parker and pals heading on a European school trip (which, of course, becomes problematic when fishbowl-wearing Mysterio turns up) looks pretty darn good. It seems to have captured all the fun of Homecoming and run with it. It looks like a decent Spidey movie, is what I’m saying.

But people are not happy.

Because the trailer “ruins” Avengers: Endgame by showing that Peter survives. And Nick Fury, for that matter.

I don’t think anyone – anyone – is thinking that when Avengers: Endgame lands it’s going to be a two hour film in which everyone perishes and Thanos goes on living in that shack like he’s a side-quest character in Red Dead Redemption.. It’s not about whether Thanos can be defeated, it’s about how. And who makes the sacrifice.

And so this trailer, by arriving earlier than Endgame, has ruined everything. Apparently.

Apart from the fact that this Spidey-flick had been announced before Infinity War. So everyone knew it was coming. It’s not a huge leap in logic to assume that Spider-man would survive. There’s a Black Panther 2 as well, and he was last seen turning to dust so lets hope nobody gets wind of that before Endgame or they’re going to lose their shit even more than they already have.

And Guardians Of The Galaxy 3, for that matter. Which currently consists of a sad, lonely and very angry raccoon.

It worries me, in a way, that people are this thrown by it. That it’s this much of a spoiler for them. I haven’t read the Infinity War comic arc, but I know enough to know with some certainty that good will triumph over evil, the snap will be reversed and things will be good again. Captain People are probably going to die, that’s for sure. Infinity War had barely started before the life was crushed out of Loki, after all (although, spoiler alert, TV series coming so that’s that ruined as well, I guess).

If you want to be super petty, you could say that the Spidey-Trailer has ruined Endgame because… no, wait, you really can’t. All it’s done is made it clear that two characters you already knew were going to live have lived.

Which is entirely the opposite of a spoiler.