Feb 19, 2019: Dental

I got an email the other day regarding the future of my dentist’s practice. The email was headed up in such a way that it provided just the right amount of dread to make you open it and read it.

And then when you do it’s just that it might be moving across town into what used to be a Chinese buffet.

Because I want nothing more than to have my teeth looked at in a building that smells faintly of sweet and sour.

But, it would appear, the denizens of Halifax are up in arms about this.

They can’t understand why there is going to be another dentist in the town centre when what Halifax really needs, apparently, is a Primark.

What I like best about this is that, as with many things, conclusions have been leapt to and no-one’s really read anything. It’s not another dentist. It’s the same dentist, just moved. People keep saying that there’s already two dentists on the other side of town. Which there is, and that’s very much the point. They’re the same practice, for all intents and purposes, so putting them in one building makes so much more sense.

Unless you’re desperate for a Primark.

In which case you can rage for days.

The thing is, though, every time I go to Halifax more and more of it is shut. More and more shops have vanished, and all those new shops that were built out towards the bus station lie empty. The ones at the bottom of Woolshops, presumably, are occupied. But who goes down there unless they absolutely have to? Especially since there’s no longer the escalator up through Woolies. Primarily because there’s not a Woolies. But that’s by the by.

If only there was a Primark, though.

Because that’s what Halifax is lacking.

It used to have a bustling market, that would see you having to dodge around people to make it from top to bottom. Now it’s by far the quietest route through the town centre. There are hardly any customers and little in the way of stalls. Mainly just the butchers clinging on. There’s probably a higher percentage of meat product in the market than there is anywhere else in town, purely because aside from a couple of shops selling trousers and some veg, there’s cock all else.

Primark, that’s what they need.

But instead, it’s just going to be my cash-hungry dentist’s but with even more opportunity to get their greedy little paws on money as they’ll be open for new customers and walk-ins. Which, to me, sounds like a recipe for dental disaster. It’s hard enough to get an appointment as it is, let alone when there’s a steady stream of unregistered idiots popping in to see if they can have seventeen fillings.

The email states that the move will enable them to provide everything we – the customer – would need and expect from a dentist.

These are the things I need or expect: A dentist, a chair to sit in, the sucky machine thing, assorted dentist tools and a sink.

The move to the ex-Chinese Buffet, though, means that it’s all of that AND floor to ceiling windows looking out onto the road outside the bus station so passing motorists and bus passengers can see us all writhing around…

… Knowing my dentist (and MyDentist) probably for a small fee.