May 7, 2019: Potato

I like to mix things up as much as I possibly can when it comes to random orders. And with Amazon Now’s two hour delivery thing, I can randomly order things to my heart’s content.

I’m sure, in its conception, Amazon Now was dreamt up as a way of getting things quickly. Things you might need right away. I use it, when I do use it, as a means of getting things when I know I am in. I’m never desperate for whatever it may be I ordered – apart from that one time we got some stuff and then turned it into a massive chocolate order because reasons. That was an emergency. Everything else, not so much.

I didn’t, for example, so desperately need an Amazon Echo and a smart plug the other week that someone should drive from Leeds with it immediately rather than waiting for it to arrive tomorrow. But I still did it.

Likewise, I wasn’t desperate for a shredder today. But if you offer me a same-day, two-hour delivery window I am going to bite your hand off. But to make it more interesting I did order something else alongside the shredder. Something we did need and want. Merely some new potatoes to go with tea. Rather than meander to the shop, I might as well get the person who’s delivering the shredder to drop off some spuds as well.

Ballsed that one right up, though.

I ended up with a tin of them, rather than the bag that I was expecting. I mean, looking back, the signs were there. I mean, it didn’t expressly say tin but it did say they were, and I’m not making this up, in a container that protected them from light. Which is very much what a tin does. I just thought it meant an opaque bag.

For the record, new potatoes from a tin aren’t nice. They’re not. It’s just a potato, some water and a couple of chemicals to keep them firm. But they’re horrid. Nasty. Evil.

But I like to think that the person assembling my order, in Leeds, was like “hang on, have I read this right? A shredder and one tin of new potatoes? Sounds like it’s going to be a fun afternoon in that house…”

Which it was, until I tried a potato…