Nov 16, 2019: Ninja

Sainbury’s home delivery is a strange beast.

Whether it’s their propensity for putting eggs under flour, or the fact that sometimes you wonder how they can function as a shop when you look at their “items out of stock” today list, there’s always a surprise.

Today they managed to arrive at the house, unpack and be at the door, in yhe minute I went into the kitchen.


I don’t think I passed out in there. I walked in, put something on the counter, walked out and saw the van outside. I opened the door in preparation and they were already there.

We were two minutes into the delivery window.

So here’s the bit I don’t get. A green delivery slot means they’re already delivering in my area. So I choose that – because environment – and I expect our delivery to be later down the line because the others in the area, which triggered the green slot for me, should come first.

And yet, 8.02am there they are. I am barely upright. Uncoffeed. Fresh from bed. Carole has left to learn things. How do they still arrive so early?

And with a substitution.

You ordered a beef joint. We have sent you a beef joint.

“Is that okay?” the driver asks.

It’s what I ordered, so yes. I mean there might be some small print I missed but it appears to be the beef I ordered. Probably at a higher price because substitutions, but still the piece of cow I wanted.

I’m still baffled now.

I’m going to cook it tomorrow, I’ll see how it goes. But, you know, its not the classic frozen sausages for chocolate drops so we’re probably on a winner…