Mar 7, 2020: Pandemic

I think, writing this from inside a hermetically sealed bubble atop a mountain far away from the smouldering remains of human civilisation, that they were right after all. The Coronavirus thing was a global pandemic after all. A pandemic which spread faster and more vigorously than anyone could have imagined.

Not the disease. That spread, sure. But it’s just nasty flu and flu kills about 600 people a year anyway, we just don’t get told when every single one if them shuffles off the mortal coil. Unless it’s a phone call from your mum telling you about “Joan, you must remember Joan… she lived next to your Aunt Mable’s friend, couldn’t eat pie? Well she’s died of flu.“

No the pandemic I’m on about is fucking idiocy.

One of the “fun” things that used to get shared on Facebook a lot, some years ago, was a “would you survive a zombie apocalypse” style quiz. It was round the time of the start of The Walking Dead and stuff like that. Everyone had a zombie apocalypse plan. They all knew what they’d do and how they’d survive.

Turns out all that grandstanding was for nought, and you’d just buy shit tons (pun intended) of loo roll and hide in your bedrooms if a bit of nasty flu came along.

The fact that, essentially, a cold with delusions of grandeur can bring a civilisation to one step above rioting and if not next door then definitely on the same street as going entirely feral is somewhat worrying.

People are being beaten up for wearing masks, or for being perceived to be a carrier of the disease. I mean, you’ve got to think beating them up, if anything, is exposing the attackers to a stronger likelihood of grtting a cold than just walking by but, you know, humankind…

It’s flu. It’s bad flu, but its flu. But everyone is convinced they’re going to get it and die of it. People are wasting NHS time ringing up and asking if they’re at risk because they’ve seen “Made In China” written on something.

The Americans stopped drinking Corona beer because… well, these are the same people who told the Japanese that their most recent earthquake was payback for Pearl Harbour and then went to the beach to watch the tidal waves come in…

The world is doomed. Not because of disease, or climate change.

Just because its full of bellends.