May 6, 2020: Forty-Seven

A man in a high-vis jacket visited our door today and pushed a leaflet through it.

As he turned to leave, I saw the back of his jacket. It had some sort of logo on it.

And the words “KEY WORKER” in large letters.


Here’s the thing.

Is he?

Is going door-to-door pushing leaflets through actually a key worker job? Would the country grind to a halt if that wasn’t done?

Almost as if pre-empting my seething rage, the leaflet he’s pushed through – a letter saying work on the gigabit speed broadband network is starting in a couple of days – has come with an attached card explaining that they have been asked by the Government to keep working because telecommunication operations is critical for the UK.

And it is. I agree with that.

I’m not sure new stuff that no-one’s signed up for yet, or is even installed is necessarily the best extrapolation of the Government’s wishes but hey, who am I to argue if they think sending someone to every house in an area, touching gates and letterboxes of people who may or may not be ill, is the best use of man power then have at it.

The little card also says that we should do everything in our powers to maintain appropriate social distancing from the people who are coming into the areas we go for walks in as part of our government sanctioned exercise regime and digging pavements up so we can’t walk on them.

I do think that if nothing else, this current pandemic means that if you look up the word “key worker” in a dictionary you’ll just get a picture of a person shrugging their shoulders because what actually is key to the continued running of this country? Leaflets? Oh ok, then.

I get that the maintenance side of things might be key.

But I’m not sure that Huddersfield having the potential for super-super fast internet is going to make the pandemic any better in the long run. It could probably wait. Not to mention the fact that the absolute best time, I think, to start digging up the pavements outside every house on a street is when their cars are parked alongside for the entire duration of the exercise. So there’s no room for the parking of worker transport and the like.

Oh but they might ask you to move your vehicle to… you know, some of the available space on the street… oh no, wait. There isn’t any.