Nov 13, 2020: Amazin

I’m really enjoying how much Amazon are taking the piss today. Really. Honestly. No, it’s great.

Mere days after failing to deliver the Xbox I asked them, months ago, to deliver on the day of its actual release, they have now gone the other way with their efficiency.

I ordered a variety of things over the past couple of days. A new cat stand, for example, and a calendar. Some hot chocolate pods for Carole. All these things were due to arrive in the future. The hot chocolate was sometime next week, the cat stand and calendar would be coming tomorrow.


Because of course not.

Everything just turned up today. Not all together, obviously, because that would have been too good. But everything came today. Earlier than the stated delivery dates proving that they actually can do the delivery thing when they want to and, in actual fact, better than they think.

If it was just one thing, I’d think it was just a bit of luck. But almost everything that I’ve ordered – nah, there’s something afoot here. If I ask Alexa where my stuff is, I expect she’ll now go “oh, there’s a package due tomor… oh wow, we’ve delivered everything. There’s something due on Thursday containing ‘console’ but it won’t come until Friday at the earliest. Chin up, buddy.”

Because that’s what she’s like when she’s not just butting in to conversations or thanking you for listening to the radio (which is a new thing she’s started and I don’t like it).

I mean, Peppa’s loved every minute of it because she’s been presented with a myriad of boxes she can claim as her own. Even the one her new cat stand came in grabbed her attention more – initially, at least – than her new cat stand, but the addition of a pom-pom with a bell on it (yaaay… that’s what you get if you don’t read the descriptions properly) seems to be winning her over.

See what happens on Thursday.

My breath is not being held.