Feb 16, 2021: Tossers

Does anyone really enjoy pancake day? Really?

I do, in that I like pancakes. But I don’t in that I don’t like making the pancakes so much. Not because they’re hard work or anything like that – apart from the first one that’s always shit and the last one that’s always shit, obviously. It’s because I have never in all my life managed to get the number of pancakes from a batter recipe that the batter recipe claims it contains.

Maybe I make them too large. Certainly not too thick, but maybe too large. Maybe I’m using too big a pan. Who knows. Either way, I have never got the requisite number of flat syrup delivery systems made.

So you make a second batch of batter. Which is not as good as the first, by any stretch of the imagination, because you’ve rushed it. You should have made double in the first place, which you did consider, but you dismissed it because the recipe said you could get twelve out of it and who can eat that many pancakes? I don’t know. I’ve never managed to make that many. But I’d give it a fair crack of the whip.

You make the second batch of batter. You start to cook the second batch of batter, and then you realise you’re filling up on the pancakes (or more correctly, the fillings) from the first batch. You only, it turns out, really want one or two from the new batch of batter because you’ve had plenty from the first batch. But it seems a shame to waste the second batch. So you make all the pancakes with it.

And, somehow, this second batch lasts longer than the first batch. It goes further. You get more pancakes from the second round than you did in the first. If you’d got this many from the first round you wouldn’t even need to consider the second round.

I’ll tell you what I’m giving up for Lent… pancakes.